Reflection is a major way in which leaders, pioneers gain from the past. What we do is a direct result of not only what and how we think, but what and how we feel as well. How you feel about things that manage how you act.
People do unhealthy things when the feelings of fear overpower the confidence, clouds the person's ability to do any job and leaving the trapped person with four conclusive choices to make:
or
As you can see, a great many people don't handle their sentiments because thinking is hard work and abstract thinking doesn’t usually lead to a change in behavior. It leads to conflict about change. That’s why our society needs leaders/philosophers who have dedicated their lives just to “Thinking”.
There are numerous methods for reflecting: Looking back, thinking back, dreaming, journaling, talking it out, going on retreats. As you can see, this is a pivotal way of making the learning conscious. Reflection gets to the root of the matter, the truth of things. After suitable reflection, the importance of the past is known, and the resolution of the experience - the game-plan you should take -- becomes clear.
“Unfortunately, too often it’s people’s failures that get them to reflect on their experiences. When you’re going along and everything is working well,
you don’t sit down and reflect. Which is exactly the moment when you should do it. If you wait for a giant mistake before you reflect, two things happen.
One, since you’re down, you don’t get the most out of it,
and you tend only to see the mistake, instead of all the moments in which you’ve also been correct.”
-- Barbara Cody
The majority of us are shaped more by negative experiences than by positive ones. A thousand things happen to each of us, but we recall the few lapses rather than triumphs because we don’t reflect. We merely react. It’s easy for the human mind to get pushed into a visual or emotional maze. We then start seeing just the parts of others and ourselves that fit the story. Thoughts, feelings, or experiences that differ our forceful experience may not become conscious.
Mistakes contain potent lessons - but only if we think them calmly, see where we went wrong, mentally revise what we’re doing and then act on revisions. That is why, reflection comes first, and then strategic action. The point is not to be the victims of our feelings; manipulated by unresolved emotions and utilize them creatively. Just as writers turn experiences of their lives, encounters into novels and plays.
One of the most important advantages of reflection is the increased capability to “Understand the psyche of the other”. By taking the time to reflect, we make some space within ourselves for understanding the activities, practices, and perspectives of the other. The important thing one must remember is -- Reflection is not about judging yourself for feeling strongly or abandoning in conveying something that is imperative to you. It’s about becoming present and mindful enough to choose how you want to accomplish things.
From the words of Isak Dinesen,
“Any sorrow can be born if we can put it in a story. Your accumulated experience is the basis for the rest of your life, and the basis is solid and sound to the degree that you have reflected on it, understood it, and arrived at a workable resolution.”
From the wisdom of Erik Erikson,
"The development process is a series of resolved conflicts. Until each conflict is resolved positively, we can't move to the next stage."
In his book "On becoming a Leader", Warren Bennis categorizes conflicts and describes the kind of Resolutions emerge from those conflicts:
Conflicts Resolutions
Blind trust Vs. Suspicion Hope
Independence Vs. Dependence Autonomy
Initiative Vs. Imitation Purpose
Industry Vs. Inferiority Competence
Identity Vs. Confusion Integrity
Intimacy Vs. Isolation Empathy
Generosity Vs. Selfishness Maturity
Illusion Vs. Delusion Wisdom
Learn to reflect on your experiences until the resolution of your conflicts arises from within you. This is the way to develop your own perspective towards change.
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